We live in a participatory world, one where we use our frameworks to interact with others at the terrestrial, cosmic and celestial levels. Participatory frameworks that have been developed at the material, soulful and spiritual levels tally with these three framework rungs. We talked about all this yesterday. In the task of preparing our participatory frameworks for optimal use in the family, in society and in international situations, we need to observe the codes of behavior that exist in different cultures and human communities. To begin with, when it comes to socialization, we need to learn to respond to the substance and method of education and the transfer of information from an older generation to a younger one, for the purpose of imbuing in the latter the attitudes of the culture. In particular, a father socializes his sons, and a mother her daughters. This primary socialization takes place in the home.
Secondary socialization takes place in the school. The teacher, after the parent, is the one that teaches the child to claim its place in society, and to surge up in the world. Teachers are becoming an indispensable part of modern society. We need good teachers in our classrooms, to be able to point our kids in the right direction and give them the skills with which to face life victoriously, and prepare them for the challenging situations they will sometimes encounter as they go through life. Tertiary socialization occurs after school, and consists in the lifelong lessons a child will learn in the workplace, and in any other situation that forces the individual to think critically and comprehensively. This sort of socialization helps the individual to test old assumptions and make a conscious effort to keep improving the self on the road toward actualization. All these forms of socialization benefit the participatory framework an individual has. Socialization in the home, which teaches commonsense coping strategies, such as hygiene, domestic work and self preservation, is useful in developing our material participatory framework, which is used at the terrestrial level. Socialization in the schools, which teaches nation building and trade acquisition, is useful in developing our soulful participatory framework, which is used at the cosmic level; and socialization after school teaches life lessons, which help us to journey along the road to self actualization.
We already talked about the necessity of selecting good teachers, individuals that are responsible enough to carry on the task of socialization effectively. Bad teachers can ruin the socialization process by not teaching well; not teaching the right stuff, or not caring enough for those they teach. We talked about some of this when we discussed St Augustine's The Teacher. We saw the epistemological value of having good teachers. Good teachers expose to their students the correct stuff; they also set good examples for such students to follow. Good teachers care deeply about the progress their students make in trying to apply what they've been taught to their everyday situations. Good teachers care about goals and means as well; about the good their socialization efforts can bring to society, but also about the welfare of their students, those who are charged with the task of bringing this good about. A good teacher is a priceless jewel.
In the home, parents are the first teachers. They are the ones who initially give the child a sense of direction and participation. For boys, a good father is quite indispensable. He shows his sons how to be boys: how to do the rough and tumble; how to fit in with other boys at school and on the playground; how to build a positive, masculine self image and how to take care of the body, and be pleasing to the opposite sex. A father can often take his son hiking or skiing or driving, or to some sports event or another. A father can teach his son how to shave, or grill or do any of the macho stuff boys and men do. A father is very important indeed in the life of a boy, especially because he is a male role model. This is why Freud has said that the biggest loss a boy can endure is the early loss of his father.
For the girls, it is the mother that serves as role model. The mother teaches the girl how to be female: how to cook; how to sew; how to knit and darn; how to tend a vegetable garden, and so forth. The mother encourages the girl to know and preserve her body especially in relating with boys. All of this socialization which takes place at the home with parents is material. When children who are properly socialized move on up to school, they begin another long training through elementary, middle, high and college schools all the way to the workplace. They learn soulful things, and not the material things which they learned at home. They learn how to think critically; how to calculate with numbers; how to write letters; how to analyze, critique; create campaigns, and so forth. They learn how to be nation builders and good citizens. They learn science and art; economics and law; mathematics and philosophy. They widen their intellectual horizons. They also learn to interact with so many other people; a much wider group of people than the members of their own family. They learn to be grownups like their parents; to become responsible and contributing members of society; to demystify the influence and protection of their parents, and to progressively take charge of their own lives in a mature and creative way for the good of society.
Children are prone to seeing their parents as Gods. Because of the relatively long period in which the child stays with and needs the parents, fathers and mothers sometimes feel indispensable, and kids sometimes relate to them that way. Kids are often in awe of their parents; fear them, and believe they are nothing without them. Cosmic level socialization in any case begins to put paid to such parental adoration by informing kids as if for the first time that they can provide for themselves and don't need parents all their lives. As parents grow older and weaker, this realization becomes all the clearer and crisper.
Celestial level socialization is such that individuals acquire skills with which to interact with a diverse world. In the workplaces after graduating from school; in the seminar rooms across the nation and the world; in churches - practically everywhere, individuals interact with people that do not share the same demographic characteristics with them; with people who do not have the specific participatory frameworks they do. With good participatory frameworks developed in the contexts of home, school and workplace well-adjusted adults can have good and productive interactions with others. For example, a Black, Christian man can interact meaningfully with an Asian, Buddhist woman at a local fundraiser for autistic children, or during events that bring them together. Especially by using whatever brought them together in the first place, the two diverse individuals can build meaningful relationships with each other. By highlighting their similarities and seeking to understand their differences, such individuals can negotiate a good working relationship in spite of having different participatory frameworks.
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